Still Life With Rice by Helie Lee

Another book which I am getting rid of is Still Life With Rice by Helie Lee. It is a story of a young American woman who "discovers the life and legacy of her Korean grandmother."

An inspiring read overall, telling a story of courage and strength. It is also a depiction of how the tumultuous history in modern Korea had turned the lives of countless ordinary Koreans topsy-turvy.

But it also contained bits and pieces of insights into the language and people.

Such as: "Neither Grandmother or Mother smiled in any of the pictures; that was the Korean way of posing for the camera."

Incidentally, that was the Chinese way too! But of course no longer these days.

This description of modern Korea made me chuckled: "The women's liberation and tampons haven't reached this part of the world. My worth is still measured by marital status (or should I say diminished by the lack of it?)"

This is funny yet sobering: "There was an old saying: A house with three daughters, a thief would not even enter such a place. For after three daughters married, there would be nothing left. Daughters were viewed as lovely bandits, who would take possessions out of their father's home and bring them to their husbands."

More descriptions on the lowly status of women. ""Say "yes" in a quiet voice and do not let that voice go beyond the walls of your house or it will bring bad fortune." Mother demonstrated in her birdlike whisper. "You are merely here to serve and not be heard."

As for life under Japanese occupation - "once every spring and autumn, the Japanese health inspector barged into each household, checking for dirt, cobwebs, insects, and rodents. It was part of the Japanese campaign to establish an orderly and clean colony, because they saw Koreans as uncivilized and incapable of keeping their homes decent without supervision."

Sexual knowledge in those pre-liberation days were seemingly scant and limited. As Lee wrote, "it was annoying being so ignorant about the relationship between a man and his wife. All I knew from stolen bits of conversations was that a husband would touch his wife in disgraceful places like her belly button and ... breasts. Why must he touch mine when he had his own?"

Furthermore, "were the gossiping whispers true about the man's thing? The women at the river told tales about it hanging like a wilted pepper between a man's leg, and when it was time to go to bed it grew to an unnatural size."

The sexual act itself was described as wretched. "Not even Mother, if she had tried, could have prepared me. How grotesquely uncivilized it was. We were no better than the livestock we butchered."

But oh, its depiction of love. "Because when a man and woman became so close, their bodies were fused into one forever. And when they were forced to part, he took a piece of her with him, leaving her walking around with a hole in her heart."

And - "through our touch, we communicated a lifetime of apologies and forgiveness. Through our eyes, we confirmed the love that flowed between us."

In conclusion - "I am Korean, and we Koreans have this unshakable faith, for we are a strong-willed people. History proves it to be so. For more than a millennium we have lived as one people and I am certain we will be united again. Unification is possible! I say this as a woman who has survived over eighty years of living; also, I say it as a woman who has given life. And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love."